growNman
growNman
I am growNman 96
We also explore the significance of building a solid family foundation and redefining success beyond material achievements. Learn how my wife’s influence has helped me become a more refined and present father, guiding me to create a nurturing environment for our children. This episode offers a heartfelt celebration of the unique bond with my wife and delivers practical wisdom for anyone striving to become a better partner and parent. Tune in to gain inspiration and encouragement for your own journey toward personal and familial greatness.
What up, dog, and welcome back to I'm Growing In. It's your man, john D, in the building. I want to say good morning and a shout out to everybody who's taking each day to find ways to get better. Today I wanted to talk about three things that I find very valuable. The first thing I want to say is, without this, for me, I don't think that I could have two and three.
Speaker 1:From the very beginning that I can recall, I always wanted to be better than people in everything, and I didn't really know how to do that. I was just putting in a certain amount of effort to get a result that I thought was good enough. But when I got to college, I met a lot of people that were good in so many different things, and then meeting these people allowed me to see the areas that I was not good at. But over the course of my life I still didn't learn the process of what it takes to actually complete a task, and I think now, now I have, I've created a routine that complements my ideas of what I want them to live like. So the number one thing that I'm so grateful for that I find valuable is my will to improve. Every day I talk to people all the time and I'm like, hey, what's going on? And they'd be like you know just living life? And I'm like, yeah, I'm trying to make it better each day. It's like, aren't we all doing that? And I know I've said this before, but everybody's not doing that. I was just talking to my wife today. People like to grow passively. They don't want to put in the actual intention to get better. They just hope, by them waking up and doing what they've been doing, that something's supposed to improve. And I know personally that you got to be God's gift to feel like you don't have to work for anything to improve. And my wife knows that if I say I'm going to do it, I'm going to do it. I do believe that I'm going to do it. I do believe that I understand how to get any and everything that I want. It just takes a certain amount of time and dedication in order to get it. And if I haven't gotten this because I didn't put enough work in, a lot of people will be like I just wasn't for you. It wasn't for you because you didn't put the effort it takes to get the result that you were looking for, the effort it takes to get the result that you were looking for. So the number one thing that I'm grateful for is my will to improve on a daily basis. This has allowed me to see fruits that I didn't even know I could create. Number two the relationship I created with my wife. The purpose of these podcasts that I decided to work on was to kind of give people an idea of how I got here.
Speaker 1:Me and my wife. We've always, for the most part, had a good relationship. But you know, like any marriage, you get those moments where it's not so good. But now that I look back, I believe that all the reasons were because of me. But now that I look back, I believe that all the reasons were because of me my false ideas of how to lead a family. My wife gave me more than enough time to figure it out, and I believe that she was being burnt out because of my ignorance.
Speaker 1:But somewhere around the age of 40, I started to reflect and I started to think how I got to where I was in life and why I wasn't where I thought I would be. And it all came down to I didn't know what I was doing, so I took it upon myself to find ways to make our relationship better, and it was through the power of communication. I've learned to communicate a lot better than that particular period of time and I didn't realize how valuable it was, but it turned our relationship into a, into something that I can't even describe at this point. I see people talk about relationships or marriages, but they don't use the language that I feel like people can truly understand how to enjoy the benefits of marriage. Now I'm working on communication so I can deliver that, but where I am with her is by far one of the best rewards I could have ever gotten, best rewards I could have ever gotten. She made me the man that I am today. She allowed me to make my mistakes, and I think that all women will allow men to make mistakes. They just have to be accountable for them and to try to put in strategies to prevent the worst from happening. And a lot of times, men, we feel like we know everything. And if, of course, if this doesn't of times me and we feel like we know everything, and if, of course, if this doesn't apply to you, don't take this offensive. I'm only talking to the people that probably view life similarly to me and they're looking for something more, and hopefully this podcast and throughout this journey can reveal my pitfalls and my accomplishments so that you can know what worked for me and what didn't. Now, some of these things, vice versa, could work for you and not work for you, but if you don't try, you're just passively hoping to get better.
Speaker 1:Number three is the way that my wife helped me become a better parent. I definitely didn't have the best parents, but my parents did the best they could with what they had, and at one point I think I was. I just thought I was doing so much better than my parents that I didn't have to do more than and I think I hurt my kids back, being that I had a wonderful compliment of my wife. She held the entire thing together and I think it changed her as a person too. She became more mean we just talked about this this morning too and it was because of my behaviors. You know, like I didn't even know what triggers were in the beginning, and she used to trigger me and I used to just get upset and I didn't curse or talk crazy, but I talked really mean where nobody would want to be talked to spoken to her, so she was able to keep this family together until I came to some understanding of how to complement her and make sure that our family grows like it's supposed to.
Speaker 1:Being a parent doesn't come with a handbook and sometimes you're just hoping you're doing the right thing and she's maybe more confident in how we approach situations for our kids to be successful in and help them to step out of known boundaries that they don't want to cross. We push them in those areas because we want them to know that they can do any and everything, but if they don't try they will never know. Know that they can do any and everything, but if they don't try they'll never know. And I think the way that I grew up I can almost say like it was like minimal guidance from my father my mother did little to no mothering because she didn't have parents when she was. Her parents died when she was little, so she had no idea. She just worked really hard.
Speaker 1:So the things that my father gave me I feel like it wasn't enough for me to be a really good parent in the beginning and I'm grateful for what he gave me. But what my wife has given me is ensuring that my kids see a more polished version of a father and a husband, of a father and a husband. This makes me feel like this is how the foundation of a family is created through the man that's willing to break the ceiling that was created well before he was born. And the only way you can break a ceiling is by looking for more information and looking for someone you think is successful and ask them how they got there. I see a lot of men fall by following the blind. You know your professional occupation, your house, your vehicles, your money does not make you a good father and a good husband. Being an owner of a business taking care of the service needs of your community does not make you a father or a husband. Like that is probably the most significant thing that's in my life. I feel like I'm a pretty solid father and husband and I'm going to keep working on it until I die. So hopefully, these three things that I find near and dear to my heart, me being able to complete what I say I'm going to, because I believe that anything can improve and it only comes through effort. Number two the relationship I created with my wife is unlike anything that I've ever seen in life. I haven't seen it on television either, and I've definitely seen better parents than me, but I'm definitely a better parent than I was in the beginning and I know parents can get better. But I do it on purpose. I intentionally go five ways to become a better father, husband, and overall it's going to make me a better man.
Speaker 1:I want to give a shout out before I get out of here to Moneyball. Moneyball is a company based out of Lansing, michigan, and they've been around for 20 plus years and I believe they're going to be the next brand to break the commercial market. And I just want him to support Representing the furthest east of Lansing. This is John D Y'all. Make today better than yesterday. Don't worry about anything you can't control. G-a-t-a Get after that action or that action will get after you. Be great on purpose.